Today is Wednesday.  For those from Bellville, Ohio, that can only mean one thing.  FAIR WEEK.  The week where everyone from Bellville return to the town to meet with friends and receive the latest gossip of other town dwellers.

Town fairs have played their part in the world of cinema.  Listed are my top 3 movie scenes (based purely on what has clips on youtube) at a fair and reasons why you would (or wouldn’t) want to attend:

3. The Sandlot

 
The Scene:  No real setup is needed for this scene.  The kids go to the fair and get into some shenanigans.  Puking shenanigans (also this was the only video I found of this scene, and all of the voices are dubbed over, but you get the idea).

THE GOOD:  Fun rides!

THE BAD:  Fun rides with puke on them!

That’s what she gets for riding The Tilt-A-Hurl (zing)

2.  Strangers on a Train

The Scene:  Bruno and Guy, two strangers that met on a train, formulate a plan……for murder.  Bruno will kill Guy’s abusive wife, while Guy will kill Bruno’s father.  Things don’t go as planned and Guy back out of the deal, but Bruno has already fulfilled his part of the arrangement.  Seriously, check this movie out if you haven’t.  Anyways, the story culminates in a fight…on a carousel?!

THE GOOD:  There’s a Tunnel of Love to ride with that special someone.

Bow chicka bow ow

THE BAD:  Carousel operators sometime get shot for comedic affect.

And only one week from retirement!

1.  Grease

The Scene:  Danny and Sandy met over the summer.  After singing about it, they try to find out if they can rekindle that love.  Well of course they do.  At the end of the film they enjoy a day at the fair and we realize that Danny and Sandy really DO go together like rama lama lama ka dinga da dinga dong.

THE GOOD:  Everybody is so busy dancing that the line for rides are probably really short.

Is this song almost over? I need a funnel cake like boogedy boogedy boogedy boogedy shooby doowop shebop.

THE BAD:  If you drive your car on the fairgrounds, it will fly into space and you will die.

Should I be worried?  Cars normally don’t do this.

So I went to Wal-Mart this week to see employees putting out Halloween candy.  HALLOWEEN.  What’s going on you guys?  Back in my day, August is still part of summah.  In fact, so is September.  What’s wrong with you big-evil-corporations?  Oh that’s right, you’re evil.  Other stores have started to follow suit as well.  It’s sickening.

Recently, I’ve been listening to the Who Charted? podcast.  Co-host, Sir Howard Kremer heavily promotes summah, and I feel like I should help spread the gospel.

So enjoy the summah!  Don’t know where to start?  Well let’s count down by five favorite summah movies to get you started on ideas!

5.  TINY TOON ADVENTURES:  HOW I SPENT MY VACATION

Much like Plucky and Buster, I TOO celebrate summah by going pant-less as often as possible.

PLOT:  As another semester ends at Acme Looniversity, the Tiny Toon gang look forward to a summer filled with fun.

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS FILM:  Um, everything?  From Plucky Duck joining Hamton’s family for a terrible road trip to Happy World Land, to Buster and Babs trying to survive a parody of Deliverance (seriously).

FAVORITE SCENE:  This, so much this.

ALSO CHECK OUT:   The Tiny Toon Adventures, duh.

4.AMERICAN GRAFFITI

Um, not born?

PLOT:   A couple of high school grads spend one final night cruising the strip with their buddies before they go off to college.

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS FILM:  This film reminds me the of summer after graduating high school.  Many of my friends stilled lived in the area and we would get together and just drive around.  We spent a lot of time at the drive-in and, of course, challenging Harrison Ford to some good ol’ fashion street racing.

FAVORITE SCENE:   John and Young Indy talking smack before racing.  Also Carol yelling, “Your car is uglier then I am!”  cracks me up every time.

ALSO CHECK OUT:   Dazed and Confused.  More American Graffiti (if you’re nasty).

3.  WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER

Too many awesome peoples in one photo.

PLOT:  Set on the last day of camp, in the hot summer of 1981, a group of counselors try to complete their unfinished business before the day ends.

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS FILM:  So many of my favorite comedians are in this.  Ken Marino, Michael Ian Black, Amy Poehler, Michael Showalter, Paul Rudd…I love this film because it’s a great send up of summer camp movies of the 80’s, but is still able to be it’s own thing.

FAVORITE SCENE:  If you don’t find this funny, you’re dead inside.

ALSO CHECK OUT:   Meatballs, Addams Family Values, Jesus Camp (Okay, that’s probably a camp movie you can skip).

2.  NATIONAL LAMPOON’S VACATION

Marty Moose can suck it.

PLOT:  The Griswold family’s cross-country drive to the Walley World theme park proves to be much more arduous than they ever anticipated.

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS FILM:  I saw this film when I was really young.  My family took a trip to Las Vegas when I was in elementary school and my dad would spend most of the trip calling me Rusty and my sister Audrey.  We even had a station wagon when I was younger!  (Not quite the family truckster, but it was a similar color).  I love this film because it was always referenced in my family and I imagine it shaped my sense of humor into what it is today (for better or worse).

FAVORITE SCENE:  Everything about this scene is perfect.

ALSO CHECK OUT:   Any of the other Griswold films. (except maybe European, although to each their own).

1.  JAWS

A sea of white people…

PLOT:  Bunch of people having a summah in the water.  Hell, even a shark enjoys summah in his own way!

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS FILM:  I mentioned in an earlier post how great this film still looks.  Part of what makes this film feel so real is that most of the extras were just locals.  Yes, you can sort of spot them occasionally look at the camera, but these people LOOK like real people that you’d see at the beach.  The non-sharky scenes feel like I’m watching a commercial telling me to visit Massachusetts.  And you know what?  I’m okay with that.

FAVORITE SCENE:  People splashing, effective dolly zoom, old man boobs!  What else could you want?

ALSO CHECK OUT:   Jaws 2, Jaws 3D, Jaws: The Revenge  (Kidding, don’t watch any of those.  If you want to watch something with Jaws in it, just watch The Spy Who Loved Me).